The Rantings of a BYU Student

tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-162857232011-12-14T20:11:11.791-07:00The Rantings of a BYU StudentWe present to you: The rantings of a BYU Student. Information will be added at least every other day, hopefully more often. Email me at CANDIDBYU@GMAIL.COM to be put on a mailing list for updates. To see archived articles - scroll down and on the right-hand side there's a section that says 'Archives'. Click on the dates to see the articles for that week.CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.comBlogger671100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1153242568680428762006-07-18T10:03:00.000-06:002006-11-01T14:42:18.453-07:00A Sample of My Work From Work

Here's a sample of something I've written for my job. I figure many of you would find this to be amusing, if not quite as passionate as my normal posts. I promise that I'll have a real post up in the next day or so.Grownups Like Toys TooLast week I sat in my apartment – playing a video game – Kingdom Hearts 2. It’s a video game that mixes Final Fantasy with Disney characters. I can hear you

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1152658151769401492006-07-11T16:39:00.000-06:002006-07-11T18:34:31.683-06:00How I Contributed To The Novell Work Dynamic

2 months ago, I arrived to work at Novell building D - at 8:00 a.m. - prompt and ready to spend the day productively. As I got out of my car, I noticed that my pants were caught in my socks. I hate it when that happens - it's one of the most embarrassing and devastating things that can happen to you in your business career. So I fixed them, and made my way on up to my cubicle. At my cubicle I

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1150684526898141662006-06-18T18:22:00.000-06:002006-06-19T13:17:15.070-06:00Tech Support - It Sucks On Both Ends

In our modern times we have come to depend on many an invention - technical inventions. And along with these technical inventions has come many a technical breakdown in products, and along with these breakdowns, to ensure their customers that they will always be there for them and wish their customers everything that's good in this world, companies are providing extra services - loving caring

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1150299053839810622006-06-14T09:19:00.000-06:002006-06-14T11:19:59.703-06:00Your Friend The Jaw

On my mission I rode a bike every single day for 22 months straight, minus 5 or 6 days for minor illnesses. Because of this I learned how to ride without hands very well - I would ride for 10 blocks straight without hands, and if it wasn't for those darned traffic lights I never would have had to put my hands on the handle bars even to stop. I even rode off a 10 inch tall curb without hands -

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1148073835995744962006-05-19T15:01:00.000-06:002006-05-19T16:15:04.583-06:00A Light & A Body

We have for you once more short story time. These are all 100% true stories, although exact factual details might have been lost over the years.Number OneOne night I fell asleep in bed while reading. This was around 11:30 p.m. Next thing I know someone's saying my name: "Christian...Christian...Christian...CHRISTIAN!!! I woke up: "Huh? Wha...What!?" "Do you want me to turn your light off?

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1147980967508427322006-05-18T13:12:00.000-06:002006-05-18T13:40:18.106-06:00The Insanity of Sleepiness

Once in a while everybody has a day or two where they're struggling to get things done. Why? Because they're tired - not tired to the point where they could sleep for a week, but just tired because they've, let's say - stayed up until 2 or 3 a.m. playing video games or reading an exciting book.And then these people, in their brain-addled states, begin to get wonderful ideas - wonderful beautiful

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1143084632494789622006-03-22T18:54:00.000-07:002006-03-22T22:31:07.433-07:00More Short Stories

More humorous short stories. Remember, I said humorous - not touching, moving, life-changing or inspirational. If you want inspirational go watch Oprah.When I was about 7 or 8 years old, my mom was filling up the bathtub for me so I could go get myself clean. I go to get in the tub and there I found my 4 year old sister in the tub, with all of her clothes on, including her shoes and socks.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1142311933435214032006-03-13T21:47:00.000-07:002006-03-13T22:10:44.490-07:00Ever Wanted a Door Made of Snow?

And now we have a picture of a really sweet prank:I heard a bunch of people laughing outside my apartment - and came out to see just what the heck was going on - talk about a sweet sight. Evidently the guys who did it to the girls put it up, then ordered a pizza, and just sat outside and watched as people would walk by, pause in astonishment, run to their apartments, and run back out with a

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1142141328098684372006-03-11T20:53:00.000-07:002006-03-11T22:34:25.463-07:00They Rued The Day

So at this one place I worked last year, which may or may not be mentioned in this article (okay - it is - i just wanted to sound all mysterious and cheesy like Tom Cruise does in many of his movies), our employers gave us this form to fill out for our "self-evaluation" asking us to honestly justify what we were worth as employees. One coworker told me if I were to just put down so much

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1141963807653417602006-03-09T21:08:00.000-07:002007-02-13T23:10:20.906-07:00BYUSA Elections: Your Farcical Entertainment For The Year

Every year around this time many students suffer from overwhelming boredom and complete studying burnout, and luckily for those students every year BYUSA comes through in full flying colors in their goal to provide students with activities and entertainment throughout the year and thus relieve the stress and pressure that students feel. They provide a beautiful activity that can entertain and

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1141631420766677732006-03-06T00:16:00.000-07:002006-03-06T01:05:19.200-07:00The Worst Landscaping Ever

We now present to you the Worst Landscaping Job Ever:(Click on the picture to enlarge it)This house is so weird looking that it belongs on a TV show or movie set, or in another country, but definitely not the United States. It's located at 520 East 2000 South Orem, UT. Look at this satellite picture of it! It's the house in the bottom left corner of the picture with the pink lines around it -

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1141548351766465592006-03-05T01:22:00.000-07:002006-03-05T01:48:31.663-07:00The Poor Fool, He Had No Idea What Hit Him

So today my roommate got the hankering to bake a cake - so that's what he did. He worked hard at it - put some nice icing on it - it was a beautiful looking cake. Then he went to taste it. The top was awesome, not dry at all, then he bit into the bottom. "Well, hmm....that's odd," he said and he put the cake up for grabs from everybody, warning everybody that it tasted just a bit funky. I

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1141370465488158052006-03-03T00:20:00.000-07:002006-03-03T02:05:13.483-07:00The Worst Sin of Them All

So I went home for a few weeks over the Christmas break - and was hanging out with my 2 sisters and my parents (I only have 2 siblings so all of us were home for Christmas) and we were genuinely enjoying each other’s company. Laughing, watching movies, playing board games, talking about life in general, and then all of a sudden the mood changed, a wave of tension came over us, and a horrified

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1140941030824614102006-02-26T00:36:00.000-07:002006-02-26T01:03:50.890-07:00Sleepers of Insanity

There comes a time in every person's life when they must do certain things, and the things that they must do most often are breathe, sleep, eat, & drink. Just as everybody sleeps nearly everybody has said or done something stupid while in their sleep, something that if they were to do it while they were awake would cause so much embarrassment that in the moment right after they did these things

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1138693796189270022006-01-31T00:27:00.000-07:002006-01-31T01:11:09.806-07:00A Grievous Error

So I got this email in my candidbyu@gmail.com inbox the other day:Though I love the newsletter I have decided that right now I just am to busy to use the information and the newsletter is just piling up unread in my inbox. Therefore I request that you remove xxxxx@xxxxxx.com from your mailing list. SincerelyName of Guy Who is NOT Your CousinTurns out that what I thought was my

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1137801703453144922006-01-20T17:00:00.000-07:002006-01-20T17:42:13.496-07:00The Crack Song

For those of you who know him - this is Carl singing about crack, as in crack the drug.Mp3 FormatWav FormatI strongly, and I mean strongly recommend that you download this file onto your computer first and then listen toit. And unless you're like SUPER obsessed about quality, I recommend the mp3 format because it's only 783 k whereas the wav format is like 8300 k.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1137738518142192132006-01-19T22:30:00.000-07:002006-01-19T23:30:28.656-07:00Fun With Pictures

Today we present Fun With Pictures. We're bound to have more fun with pictures in the future. These pictures feature me with a partially shaven head and a really weakly grown beard which has since grown in better. Enjoy! For those of you who aren't sure what this is - it is the BACK of my head - there you have the collar of my shirt along with the back of my ears. There is my left side of my

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1137525393561900332006-01-17T11:58:00.000-07:002006-01-20T13:23:14.226-07:00Language: Your Barrier to Communication

Today we present another segment on language. We all use language as a tool for communicating ideas from one person to the other, ideas like, "I like soup" or "I hate tomatoes". These are very important ideas that must be communicated eloquently to other people - if not we would all either die of starvation or, even worse, end up eating terrible nasty things like tomatoes or olives once in a

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1137127754364690952006-01-12T21:18:00.000-07:002006-01-13T21:33:18.730-07:00Moustache Day Status Report

We just wish to report that Moustache Day was indeed a success! A complete and total success! We may not have had 7000 Moustached Men & Women walking around campus, but word about it definitely spread far and wide, as illustrated by this story:My roommate Ben was standing around there, in his university shirt because he works for BYU and all, and somebody ran up to him and said, "Hey man!

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1136660455426436872006-01-07T11:37:00.000-07:002006-01-07T13:07:06.070-07:00Tracting Stories: The Good & The Bad

Couple of quick stories from the mission. They're not spiritual religious experiences or anything, just funny things that tend to happen on the mission.Elder Evans and Elder Bell were a companionship - two of the first missionaries I lived with. Both funny fellows - Bell had a nice full set of hair and so did Evans. But Evans was worried to death that he was losing his hair. He'd run his

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1136497925725327722006-01-05T14:11:00.000-07:002006-01-07T06:44:12.510-07:00Hair Trimming: An Art Form

So there I was, shaving my head... so that I'd have the 'bald headed bearded look'. It's usually an easy way of getting a haircut, and the shorter the haircut is the longer you have to wait until you cut it again. But this time my hair was too long and it kept on gumming up the razor. My only two real options for shaving it were either to take a shower while shaving so it would rince all the

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1136408013793360172006-01-04T10:26:00.000-07:002006-01-04T14:00:55.496-07:00Key West Sucks During the Holidays

Last Monday at noon I was chatting with my friend Dave online. He says to me, "So - roadtrip?" "Sure - where?" "I don't care - you?" "Miami?" "How long?" "If we drive hard - tomorrow" "Let's do it"In we got into the car, and off we went. I was supposed to go to a family party that night, but I decided the road trip was more important. I'd been having 2 days of family parties already, and

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1136111752225277772006-01-01T03:14:00.000-07:002006-01-01T03:35:52.286-07:00What a Wonderful New Year!

I just want to take this time to proclaim a Happy New Year to everybody! It's been a great vacation at home. For more vacation details, read on:Started off by hanging out with the whole Farmer Family for a baby blessing, then we played monopoly with the cousins. Incidentally I won 2 out of 3 of the games. The game I lost it was 3 people who merged to play against me, and I say this oh so

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1135449143828382212005-12-24T09:48:00.000-07:002005-12-24T12:47:04.176-07:00Multi-Level Marketing (MLM): A New Business Opportunity!

There is a huge sensation sweeping Utah - I mean just SWEEPING it! All over the place - from the far northern lands by Logan down to the southern hills of St. George. "Just what IS this sensation!?" you cry? "I must, I say must, know about this!" Okay okay - I can tell that you are all chomping at the bit with insanity, just waiting to hear what it is. Are you ready? Okay - here we go:

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1135209708951536882005-12-21T16:10:00.000-07:002005-12-21T17:01:49.036-07:00Christmas with The Farmers

It's time for me to go home, to spend Christmas with the Farmers. No, I do not mean I will spend Christmas in a rural area where the air is clear and the grass grows tall and people truly know the meaning of the word 'neighbour'. No, in this case I mean Christmas with my family - The Farmers.Back when I was growing up we would all (and by all I mean EVERY member of the family from my Grandpa

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1134068122762051712005-12-08T11:17:00.000-07:002005-12-08T13:14:46.300-07:00Moustache Day - January 9th, 2006!

Folks - I should have published this earlier, but later is better than never. We want to have Moustache Day on campus! "Just what IS Moustache Day?" you ask? It is a day for us to go out and celebrate and rejoice in and wear the only article of facial hair that is allowed by the Honor Code: The Moustache. Moustache Day will take place on January 9th, the First day back from school. It will

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1133562214954531702005-12-02T15:15:00.000-07:002005-12-02T16:47:14.833-07:00Bunches of Stories

I now present to you funny little anecdotes that are too small to put in just one article by themselves. Each paragraph is a separate story in and of itself.Below is the tracking information for something I ordered from amazon.com. Their packages arrive before they're even dispatched.I went to the Big & Tall shop to find me a new suit. They told me my size is 58W which the man described as 58

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1133495590096681112005-12-01T20:49:00.000-07:002005-12-01T20:53:10.110-07:00The 100 Hour Board

There's a website at BYU called the 100 hour board. Check it out at http://theboard.byu.eduSeems like it's a pretty interesting concept - people write in and ask it questions, and within 100 hours of the time you ask the question they will provide an answer for it, unless they think the question isn't good enough - which is understandable.I found out 1 week ago about the existence of this board,

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1133481704533931312005-12-01T16:58:00.000-07:002005-12-01T21:25:36.613-07:00Depression - Seasonal and Otherwise

Right now I'm sitting here - I haven't written a decent thing in over a week, and I have a few really good topics I could hit on, but I really don't want to even start. Why? I've been depressed - not seriously depressed to the point where I'm miserable, but depressed to the point where it takes away my personality and makes me feel numb to all emotions and makes me incapable of telling a joke,

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1132935051449484862005-11-25T08:55:00.000-07:002005-11-25T09:10:51.463-07:00At Home

So right now I'm at home, with my family, and I'm on vacation, and I'm trying to write something funny, but everytime I try nothing comes to mind. It's not that I don't have several things or grievances that I could write on, it's just that this computer is down in the family room, and being that it is in the family room there is always family around. "How dare you blame your family and bring

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1132560229970674742005-11-21T00:44:00.000-07:002005-11-22T00:35:31.220-07:00Back in the Day

Just a few really quick funny stories from my high school days.Story #1Back in high school I was a really shy kid. I mean REALLY shy. I let this one girl, April Miller, call me Sebastian (my name is Christian) for the first few days I knew her in class. Thank goodness somebody finally told her, "Um, I don't think that's his name."All sorts of problems happen when you have the name 'Christian'.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1132129891329823992005-11-16T01:30:00.000-07:002007-01-11T08:05:45.843-07:00Professor Lynn Garner Writes Calculus Book

Hello students! Have you had the wonderful privilege of taking a math class from one of our BYU Professors? If so, then have you had the extra privilege of that math class being one of the Calculus courses taught here? And if that last statement is true, did you take that class since 2002? If not, then you’ve been missing out on a wonderful new experience brought to us by the BYU Math

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1132121084438877422005-11-15T21:14:00.000-07:002005-11-16T01:33:11.480-07:00Overly Dependent Students

I work in a computer lab on campus - helping students out with various computer projects and problems that they have when dealing with these projects. It's a fun job for the most part and has helped me learn a lot. Because of this job I now know about HTML, and actually know the ins and outs of Microsoft Word, and believe you me, there are a lot of those when dealing with that pain-in-the-butt

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1131840478266558212005-11-12T17:03:00.000-07:002005-11-15T21:13:01.056-07:00Dating: The Stupid Gene

There comes a time in every person's life when they start to like someone. I don't just mean like as in 'it is fun to hang around them' but I mean like in a romantic sense. They wish to date this other person. The second they start to have romantic feelings for this other person, a new feeling arises inside them, a feeling brought on by what I have come to dub: The Stupid GeneAt this point I

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1131685985442502152005-11-10T21:57:00.000-07:002005-11-11T19:51:59.173-07:00The Antics of Fanatics

There are many different types of fans of things out there in the world. Fans Who Could Care Less who might possibly go see the movie if a group of friends are going to go see it and there's nothing else better to do than sit at home doing dishes, Fans Who are Merely Devoted that will go watch a movie in the first week it comes into the theater, Fans Who Care that will wait in line for a couple

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1131683512643121982005-11-10T21:24:00.000-07:002005-11-10T21:56:41.043-07:00Cheers' Take On Mormons

Cheers ClipThis is a really funny video about Mormons that was on Cheers. Just right click on this link, and hit 'save target as' and download it to your computer to watch it.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1131513128577961882005-11-08T20:33:00.000-07:002005-11-08T22:12:08.626-07:00Dating: The Setup

This week I wish to discuss dating and marriage and BYU's ultimate goal of getting the whole world married. Oh BYU will never come out and directly tell this to you - at least no official person at the university. But every member of every Bishopric of every BYU Ward must go through some secret leadership training which brainwashes the heck out of them until all they can talk about is dating,

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1131417496073525422005-11-07T19:10:00.000-07:002005-11-07T22:56:18.080-07:00Misadventures In Landscaping

A few years ago I decided to take a job as a landscaper. It was a beautiful job, a wonderful marvelous job, a job which led me to do many wonderful things that I never knew myself to be capable of before in my whole entire existence. A job where I had no real supervision, and no experience - and I was sent out into the world to wreak havoc wherever I could.On the first two days the only thing

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1131080912190500922005-11-03T20:48:00.000-07:002005-11-03T22:35:31.390-07:00Sauerkraut: Can Letters to the Editor Get Any Better?

Today we wish to present to you: Weirdest Letter Sent In To The Daily Universe By a Student Award. We have read many letters, and ranked them according to a stringent standard (we flagrantly disagree with everything it says) and this letter won by 3 full Weird Points. Congratulations to Lance Tonnies - whose letter, which pertains to Flying Sauerkraut, we will now take apart piece by piece.You

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1130774212465341202005-10-31T08:24:00.000-07:002005-11-01T00:40:26.470-07:00A Plasma Donation Story

Like some of you fortunate few out there, I donated plasma for a small period of my life. It's an absolute bargain for students - just give away some of your body in exchange for money! And all you have to do for this money is stick a needle that's slighter larger than those used to donate blood for just an hour or so. It's quick! It's easy! It only hurts a wee bit! And as an added plus they

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1130386433908357972005-10-26T21:49:00.000-06:002005-11-07T22:45:46.266-07:00Family Fun Part 5

OK - just a couple of quick family stories for today. One was given to me word for word by my aunt. I think she tells it better than I could tell it. The other one is my Grandpa and a character whose identity shall not be revealed until the end of the story. That would give away the joke.Story Number OneFrom the Mouth of Aunt Sue: Your father was about, well, he could do the exact dates, how

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1130303551291884402005-10-25T22:10:00.001-06:002005-10-25T23:12:31.296-06:00Businesses That Would Be Obsolete Without Students

We wish for this to be the first part of a series of articles. Articles that talk about businesses that would be obsolete if we students weren't here to provide labor for them. Businesses which, in order to be financially successful, require dirty, nasty, TERRIBLE work to be performed, such as will be illustrated here below.Business Number One On Our List - TELESURVEYINGIf you haven’t worked at

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1129155939759361682005-10-12T15:41:00.000-06:002005-10-12T16:25:39.773-06:00Hometeaching Woes

Today we bring up something that has been sure to plague all of us here at BYU: HORRIBLE HOMETEACHERS. Now many of you out there are shaking your heads and screaming, "How dare you malign such a sacred institution!" You fools! I'm not maligning hometeaching, but merely some of the weirdos that have hometaught me in the past.We now present some of the common Hometeaching Mishaps which could

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1128658390435986482005-10-06T21:56:00.000-06:002005-10-06T22:13:10.440-06:00Ad Critiquing

So I just had some Papa John's Perfect Pan Pizza the other day. It was most delicious and filling to my stomach. The ad for the pizza said something like the following: "When I first tried Papa John's Perfect Pan Pizza I swore off all other deep dish pizzas. The second time I tried it I swore off swearing."The first line of this add does a marvelous job of encouraging me to buy it. However,

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1128322598448428252005-10-03T00:32:00.000-06:002005-10-03T01:20:05.790-06:00Quest For a Pizza

Once a former roommate of mine was heard to remark, "I don't know which of the 7 deadly sins I like most - sloth or gluttony. I think I'll go with sluttony."This true tale epitomizes sluttony.I was sitting on my beautiful reclining chair with my feet up on the foot rest, having a lovely conversation with my 2 friends, when I hear this clunk, and I fall over backwards, so here I am with my back

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1128055590560816642005-09-29T22:34:00.000-06:002005-09-29T22:46:30.566-06:00Funny Short Stories

OK - two quick funny short stories - both about the same person.I went with George to go donate plasma at Alpha (it's closed down since) and I'm sitting there getting my blood pressure & stats taken, when I hear this really loud voice coming from my left, loud enough so the whole room can hear it. "I'm wondering why you want to know if I've been in prison for more than 72 hours. Do you just

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127938386611467692005-09-28T14:01:00.000-06:002005-09-28T14:13:06.620-06:00Guide to Cheap Good Eats

Okay, we now present to you some places we know with really good cheap good food. This is essential information for every student. Also: please comment on your own places as well so we can all share in your joy too.TACOS GUANAJUATO495 W 800 N, PROVO, UT 84601Phone: (801) 356-2779Awesome place to go for chimichangas. I've only had their beef chimichanga so for, but it was most excellent. Best

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127879845216961632005-09-27T21:45:00.000-06:002005-09-27T22:23:48.363-06:00Students Slap Teachers Day

Are you sick and tired of the ‘less effective’ method of Teacher Evaluations? “What IS the ‘less effective’ method of Teacher Evaluations?” you ask? Why it’s the method provided to us by our school wherein the teachers tell us to take these surveys online & occasionally the teachers look at it and take it to heart. Let us stress that we do believe that MOST teachers take these comments to heart

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127776651503700472005-09-26T12:09:00.000-06:002005-09-26T17:17:31.673-06:00A Copout

Author’s Note: The names in the following flyer have been changed to protect the innocent. It was written as a joke, and the author had the consent of the person of whom the flyer was written about. Her roommates loved the flyer, and helped to pass it out. She herself read the flyer before it was passed out. Do not worry, no harm came to her. The following flyer is also a copout by the author

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127604392333442952005-09-24T16:45:00.000-06:002005-09-24T17:26:32.340-06:00Just Give In To Your Illness, Make It Your Friend

Hmm - I thought I would be better today and able to think clearly, but I'm actually feeling sick. Unfortunately, it's not the sort of sick that makes it so that I can't go into work. It's the sort of sick where you want to go home from work, but you'd feel really guilty if you did it. The sort of sick where you can still get things somewhat done, but really shoddily done. The kind of sick

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127522788662464312005-09-23T18:06:00.000-06:002005-09-23T18:47:31.083-06:00Family Stories 4

OK, this will be just a quick post, but I promise that I'll get a couple of decent articles up and written over the weekend. You know those days where you try to be witty, and bright, and enlightening to all those around you, but everything you say pretty much comes out as completely sarcastic and just flat out mean? Well, that's the day I'm having now - so instead of trying to be creative I

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127510432800673462005-09-23T15:18:00.000-06:002005-09-23T15:20:32.806-06:00Okay, I was Dumb

I'm sorry - I should have followed this rule: "Never battle with a stupid person because they're too stupid to know they've been beaten." Come back and comment all you want Wake Up and people of similar intelligence. Remember: you're only hurting yourself.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127492294667951292005-09-23T10:01:00.000-06:002005-09-23T10:35:34.753-06:00Intelligent Comments

k, I was hoping that I wouldn't have to make any announcements about this. Most comments on here (all but 1) have been intelligent. I'm quite alright with critiquing as long as it's done intelligently. Please don't make comments like the person named 'wake up' did under 'Updating Your Personal Information'. At least read the article before you make a rebuttal. Wake Up's comment is akin to

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127370757366680752005-09-22T00:30:00.000-06:002005-09-22T00:54:49.610-06:00On Commenting Anonymously

I completely approve of commenting anonymously on here. However, you can more often than not hilight the radio button next to 'other' and then type in a pseudonym, like say ItsyBitsySpider40, or Boy Wonder. That way we can kind of differentiate one anonymous person's comments from those of another.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127361575905041672005-09-21T21:10:00.000-06:002005-09-22T07:55:44.633-06:00Fees: The Ultimate Destiny of Mankind

Preface: This article is supposed to be a good natured ribbing about the increasing of fees. Also, it's meant to apply to the whole world in general, but it focuses on BYU because that's where I have the most recent examples of it occurring.Many people have noticed that BYU has recently started increasing fees to be paid and adding policies that students must follow this year. This leads us to

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127286829860756842005-09-21T00:58:00.000-06:002005-09-21T01:13:49.866-06:00Family Stories Part 3

Just a couple of quick stories from family stuff: Story Number 1My grandpa's a mortician. For 13 years he was also a bishop, so everybody called him Marry 'em Bury 'em Fred. During family dinners my dad and his sisters would say, "Tell us about your day, Father," and he'd say, "Well, I had a real interesting case today..." and Grandma (who has a voice like Edith Bunker from All in the Family)

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1127166271513769562005-09-19T15:36:00.000-06:002005-09-19T15:44:31.520-06:00BYU: It’s More Than Just a School

Welcome new students to Brigham Young University, a University that is much more than just a University! We pledge to be better than the rest, to rise above them, to stand forth and to show an example to the rest of the poor universities out there. That’s right dear students: We pledge to be your mother! We don’t care how old you get at this University, we will still think of you as ‘Our

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126989844709829442005-09-17T14:36:00.000-06:002005-09-17T14:45:57.326-06:00Updating Your Personal Information

Reference Article: http://newsnet.byu.edu/story.cfm/56583It’s Tuesday, 12:49 p.m., you’re going down the sidewalk to get to your next class when all of a sudden the idea pops into your head, “Hey! I have 2 whole minutes to check my amazingly efficient Route Y Email!” So you head to the nearest computer lab, or terminal, or pop open your laptop (or you go find a friend who has a laptop.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126673805247266952005-09-13T21:58:00.000-06:002005-09-16T15:13:48.266-06:00More Family Stories

Well, quite frankly - it's late, and I'm tired, I don't just mean a little tired - I mean the sort of tired where if someone asked you what your middle name was, you'd tell them it was Frank, and then 15 minutes later you'd realize that you don't have a middle name, but if you did have one, you'd wish it was something manly like Hank or Slugger or something like that, and why the heck are we

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126648815092032672005-09-13T15:57:00.000-06:002005-09-13T16:00:15.096-06:00We HIGHLY Encourage Comments

We want this to be a forum for a free exchange of thought. Feel free to leave comments on here. Of course, all comments beyond the bounds of decency will be deleted.

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126592597396796272005-09-12T22:08:00.000-06:002006-04-21T15:24:51.326-06:00Wonderful Words Americans Don't Use

Today we are proud to present to the world: Wonderful Words Americans Don't Use. We hope to make this a regular segment - and hopefully get people to present other words that we, the makers of this blog, are not aware of either. The first word we present to you is: Garbarator. Garbarator is a Canadian word, and we're not sure how it's spelled (any Canadians out there please feel free to

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126237670657924092005-09-08T21:41:00.000-06:002005-09-09T12:31:59.416-06:00The Right To Bare Facial Hair

Today we wish to discuss a subject of great controversy, a subject which has divided the masses, and pitted men against women, brother against sister, boyfriend against girlfriend. We’re not talking about the dreaded ‘one-strap backpacks’ that no girl should ever wear or even about the difference of people wearing shorts that are one inch above the knee versus shorts that are two inches above

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126161732216850172005-09-08T00:15:00.000-06:002005-09-08T01:13:59.030-06:00Family Stories

Okay, here's a couple of family stories which might sound like they're made up - but I swear they're not. I know I shouldn't swear, but darn it, I just can't help myself.Story Number One: - My uncle HATES taxes. He hates them so much he goes to great lengths to not have to pay them. So once he raised a bunch of goats, and gave them all names and social security numbers and tried to claim them

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126061823903375202005-09-06T20:39:00.000-06:002005-09-06T21:50:02.950-06:00Humanities Testing Center Explanation

First off - this article is informative - while the article "The Humanities Testing Center Experience" is very funny and you really should read it.The article below is true - and I went and passed it around campus during the summer as well as emailed it to 100 BYU humanities professors. "Why in the world would I do such a crazy thing?" you ask? Before I answer that question I recommend that you

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1126059543612859112005-09-06T20:18:00.000-06:002005-09-06T20:19:03.616-06:00The HUMANITIES Testing Center Experience

Welcome one and all to the NEW Humanities Testing Center – it is located down in room B153 of the new JFSB (Joseph Fielding Smith Building) and has some wonderful, marvelous new features and rules of which you are yet to be aware. These features are truly fantastic, and cannot be discovered by merely reading the rules on the front door. The first and most important rule is, and we quote, “

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1125985280231460772005-09-05T14:39:00.000-06:002005-09-06T20:15:23.143-06:00The Purpose of This Blog

This blog is just a place for me to put down my thoughts on various subjects into writing and for people to come and read it if they wish. All you BYU students out there are probably now wondering why I don’t just send in a letter to the Daily Universe instead or perhaps try to just publish a flyer using my own resources and spread it all around campus.The reasons for the latter are obvious: 1) I

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16285723.post-1125797232803659162005-09-03T19:24:00.000-06:002005-09-08T02:02:59.380-06:00BYU Bookstore Benefits Students

Reference Article: http://newsnet.byu.edu/story.cfm/56365The bookstore this week has implemented a new policy to benefit students: No more returning of books if you found it from a cheaper or better source. The bookstore is using this as a revolutionary new way of marketing. Instead of saying, “If you find our products on sale elsewhere for a better price, we’ll match you,” they’re using the

CThttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07587192353508569035noreply@blogger.com5